This is a repost from my other blog, Calling Rome Home. I hope it will help to explain the inactivity of the Catholic Converts blog over the past few months. Please bear with me as I start the process of catching up while trying to stay focused on my own relationship with Christ.
It's been just over 14 months (about 10 months here) since my last post. It's amazing how quickly time goes by.The past year has been one of spiritual struggle which reached a cresendo about eight months ago when I stopped going to confession, a month later stopped going to Mass, and fell back into some old, and into some new, sinful ways.I reached a point where I felt as though my prayers weren't being heard, or possibly even ignored, because I felt like I wasn't getting any answers. I let bitterness take over and turned away. Over the last few months God has gently guided me to the realization that maybe I wasn't hearing any answers because I was listening too intently for what I wanted to hear instead of what he was saying. This realization came through a series of nudges from God when I wasn't thinking about Him, on the way to work, while eating dinner, etc. Just little thoughts that would pop into my head.I made my first confession in 8 months yesterday afternoon. I have never felt more vulnerable nor more emboldened than when my confessor spoke about it being the grace of God that prevented my faith from being destroyed and lead back to the sacraments.I'm not sure yet what God has to say to me, but I pray and ask you friends to pray for me, that I may put aside what I want to hear and listen to Him.
16 comments:
I just came by to see if my former Protestant blog could be used to chronicle my journey home to Rome.
I've already gotten some ugly "whore of Babylon" anonymous comments...so I know they are reading and it's a chance to be a good witness to the truth of the CHURCH...the one and only that Jesus said the gates of hell would not prevail against!
HOWEVER, I will pray for you because I just now wrote on my blog for people to pray to hear God's voice and not their own.
God timing, huh? Wow :-)
But I'm praying for you. Confession is NECESSARY and I can't wait for my first one when I get into the church!
They are there to watch over your soul and to hold you accountable before GOD...that is what a good shepherd does with a flock that has been intrusted to him.
Go alot if you need to...don't fall back...perservere...you can do it with HIS strength...HE has more than enough for you and all of us!
May the peace of Christ be with you,
Teri
p.s. My blogsite is
http://aviewfromthemountaintop.blogspot.com/
I've only had one post so far, but I would like to be on your converts or getting ready to be roll....I'm in RCIA at St. Anne's Parrish in Bristol,VA...we have it year round.
Glad your back home where you belong.
As quickly as we fall away, we can fall just as quickly back into the arms of Christ. I pray that you have a rapid spiritual growth.
..you wrote "Just little thoughts that would poop into my head" . I added an "o". hahaha
Satan has a way of decieving us. Our minds are the battle ground . We know that this is where the battle for our souls are won or lost . When we understand this our perspectives about many things begin to change. God would never abandon or forsake you even if your decieved into believing so, but we begin to believe his lies. You've passed this snare. We have to help build up the body of Christ ,and help others with these snares.
You are describing EXACTLY the situation I was in for many years until about a year ago. I had assured Him that bad as things were, I would continue to have faith no matter what happened. What happened was, things got even worse and then got worse again and finally I gave up. I came back (9 years later) but I am finding myself tempted again to believe that He is just ignoring me and all my prayer is empty.
Hang tough, Brother. I can relate with what you've gone through. Yes, I'll send a prayer up for you, and you do the same for me. God Bless. Keep the faith. ---Joe
Welcome back! As an RCIA program director I often worry that people who come thorugh our process can continue to struggle at times without the same kind of support they may have had. And life does put pressure on our faith, not to mention the Evil One.
Your return is encouraging, and I hope it encourages others.
Hi Chris. I think we all go through this and if we did't then there is something wrong. Please come visit my site. I have only one post up at this time, as it is a new blog, but you may find it helpful. God bless you.
I have found in the past that when I don't want to go to church that that is the time I most need to go! Your honesty and humility is a most courageous witness to the love and mercy of God.
Welcome back! It's true, when you want to be close to the Sacraments the least, that's when you need them the most. Look at them as life support, because that is what they are!
I'm from Brazil, I love the Catholic Church, but since 2006 I have been suffering from something very uncomfortable, a pain caused by the mind that are bothering me when I'm sitting in church. I often discouraged from going to church because of this pain, which generates a depression that is so unbearable.
Since I returned to the Catholic Church after leaving the evangelicanismo, this pain will not let me and this disturbs me, because I blog, website, and apostolate and a pain that pain. I ask God that when he was evangelical had this pain but it was not until I joined the Catholic Church that basically started this pain.
Oh, God! I pray, pray. I have faith in the Virgin Mary but sometimes I'm not satisfied, my prayers that God does not listen. Until I am abandoned by God. It is very disappointing.
I ask: if God wants me to work for him, why does this pain some? Pray for me, I give my life by faith.
Please, if any priest, brother, religious, can pray for me, I really need this because I feel God knows and is unbearable. Brethren, pray for me.
My name is Emerson de Oliveira and my email is emeoliv@gmail.com
Hi, your experience slowly drifting away from the sacraments and towards sin describes my last twelve months exactly. I've discussed it with my awesome parish priest and I'm heading back in the right direction now.
I've begun my daily prayers again (Liturgy of the Hours) and am headed to Confession.
God is good and we're surrounded with minor miracles constantly!
Hi Chris - Hope you're doing alright.
God bless,
Jon
Welcome back!
God bless you
Michael
Chris,
I see that it's been another 13 months since your last post; I hope everything is okay. (I've just added your "Catholic Converts" banner, as well as the "Proudly Entered the church in 2009" one.) Are you still adding blogs to the roll?
I have no idea what you might be going through, really, but I'm in a difficult time in my life as well (divorce, derailed career plans, moving) and as a convert from lifelong Protestantism, the short story is that I can say for myself that I don't know where I'd be without the Church today. I hope and pray that whatever is going on as of now, that you're finding yourself strengthened by the Church too.
Hi there--
great site
I've been emailing trying to add my blog to your worthy list, but haven't heard back
are you still accepting new blogs?
thanks
---todd
http:\\catholicsojourner.blogspot.com
September 9, 2014
Two Catholic Conferences : Both interpret Vatican Council II with an irrational premise.One accepts the Council the other rejects it
http://eucharistandmission.blogspot.it/2014/09/two-catholic-conferences-both-interpret.html
September 9, 2014
Muller-Fellay Meeting: Cardinal Muller will not accept Vatican Council II without the irrational premise and he wants the SSPX, FFI to use the false premise with the Council and Catechism ?
http://eucharistandmission.blogspot.it/2014/09/muller-fellay-meeting-would-cardinal.html
Joanita Dsouza joanitad@gmail.com very very devout catholic, lesbian having trouble with catholic church, resorts to harassing and blackmailing non catholic women, straight women. Help
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